Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Not-So-Common Christmas Carols

This week I was lucky enough to be shortlisted in the BMB Brilliance in Blogging Awards in 'Best Fresh Voice' - which is a category for new bloggers. On hearing the news I was obviously thrilled, but that quickly turned to terror when I realised I would have to post something worthy of the nomination - otherwise it's a bit like getting caught with your trousers down (or as my fellow nominee over at Alexander Residence noted 'it's like being in an accident without matching underwear'. Ha ha ha I laughed - as if any of us have matching underwear!)
So I thought about what I would post - A Dear Santa Letter?, The Annual Marital Argument whilst decorating the Christmas Tree, The Joys of Blogging...To be honest I was getting my non-matching knickers in a bit of a twist so I decided to throw caution to the wind and act like I'm funny with:

My Christmas List of Alternative Carols 

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas - Just don't get too pissed in front of the in-laws.

The Weather Outside is Frightful - I just slipped on my ass in front of the neighbours.

Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer - Was an alcoholic.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town - Lock up your daughters.

I Saw Three Ships - Then I realised it was just one and I'd drunk too much.

The Little Boy That Santa Claus Forgot - Was actually on the naughty list.

Angels We Have Heard On High - Where'd ye get that weed?

The First Noel - Was Edmonds, then came Gallagher.

We Three Kings Of Orient Are - Lost. How did we end up in this dump?

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen - Sleep it off on the sofa you drunken fools.

Santa Clause Got Stuck In My Chimney - Fat Bastard

Oh dear - I think I may have blown it....

(Oh and thanks for all your lovely votes - you really are very good looking you know). x


  1. This is FANTASTIC! Congratulations!!

  2. I came over and commented on this last night but must have done it wrong oops sorry! Ha ha or ho ho ho! great post. The three ships made me chuckle most ;) but also like the angels on high and first Noel.
    Oh I am glad I came back, I've been trying to do christmas food shop on t'internet with 4yo wailing in my ear. Needed a good laugh!
    Off to tidy my underwear drawer now! Thanks for the mention lovely x

  3. I voted for you, congrats on the short list!

    I love the list! Sooo funny! So true.

    Rudolph is a drunk, being trying for years to get that kid clean.

  4. Wonderful list, thanks--we've been singing your version of 'frightful weather' all week. And matching or non-matching underwear aside, congratulations! Much deserved, keep up the good stuff.

  5. That's delightful. I hope I'll have my voice back till Christmas. Shalalalala.

  6. You do make me laugh! Voted for you too, love your blog. FBx

  7. I would pay good money to hear any of those sung in a nativity play. Very funny.

  8. Very good - you should definitely write a whole carol for your next post - you clearly have a way with words! I have been and voted for you too so best of luck.


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