Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Drinking and Denial

OK I admit it. My husband and I like the occasional tipple.

In fact I've spoken about our drinking habits before in the national press.

However last weekend DH sank to a new low. Not in the amount he drank or the trouble he got himself into. No, in his ridiculous repudiation of the actual truth.

Let me explain.

It's Friday night. The end of another long week and time for a well deserved drink (that's the usually Friday excuse, Thursday could be 'bad day', Wednesday 'good day', Tuesday 'nice meal' , Monday 'we need to finish off that open bottle on the counter', Sunday 'end of the weekend', Saturday 'it's Saturday').

Anyway, having polished off our bottle of wine I decided to hit the hay and left him cradling his umpteenth glass of vodka and coke in front of some sports related TV programme. It was my turn to do the morning shift next day (I know this because my days are Monday - Sunday inclusive and he does....erm.....hmm, something not quite right here...).

So, when I got up the next morning I noticed a seriously abused bottle of vodka on the counter alongside - a shot glass.  Yes Ladies and Gentlemen my husband was doing vodka shots on Friday night - at home by himself.

Absolute Asshole

Now that's pretty low.

But that's not all.

When he eventually dragged his hungover ass out of bed and stumbled around the house for half an hour I showed him the shot glass.

'Having a little party last night were we?' I asked

He rubbed his head and said in complete seriousness -

'Yeah, I think all those soft drink mixers were giving me a headache'.

Yep that'll be it.

A new low - even for him.


  1. Love the fact that the it was the soft drink. Have never tried that but it has potential...

  2. It's a well known fact it's the coke that gives out the headaches and not the vodka obviously. Men!

  3. Hmmm, exactly how much coke was he putting in that shot glass?

  4. Perhaps you're right Farmers Wife - he may be on to something. Do you think you could ring in sick with that one?

  5. Heh heh heh. Enjoyed that. Sounds like me and your fella might get along.

  6. Ha ha! A good gin and tonic can be totally ruined with too much tonic I find...

  7. Har har har!!!! Send him to me. I can rationalize right along with him. (It must have been really cheap wine to do that to me after only 2 bottles...)

  8. Hi nice to meet you, came through Hot Cross Mum. Jody here, Kiwi, used to live in london, now Oakland CA. I always feel a refreshing glass of Kim Crawford (my fave NZ Sauvignon Blanc) - at that wonderfully bewitching hour of Bed Bath and Beyond is a necessity. My only "issue" is that it does not stop at one....

  9. Fancy - on no account will I ever be letting you two in the same room.

  10. The morning shift is a funny one, my husband manages to justify staying up late drinking wine, by going to 'work'. Just watching CBeebies with the kids having removed the half drunk wine glass and turned off all the lights he left on. He did admit he owes me a billion lie ins yesterday, I shall take a month off soon. Fancy a drinking spree?

  11. Yes I do - Vodka shots and all. Do you know my husband justifies the lie ins with the fact that a) he goes to work (yawn) and b) I go to bed so early it shouldn't be a problem for me!! And WHY DO YOU THINK I HAVE TO GO TO BED SO EARLY DUMBASS?!

  12. Back off everyone and mind your own god damn business!! It had been another hard Saturday of fulfillng all my required duties both as a husband, father and gambler and I was celebrating another hard earned loss on attempting to predict football results. I thought what went on indoors stayed indoors? How wrong I was. I shall be keeping a strict eye on Mrs Gunn from here on in and if she appears to have gone AWOL, then she probably has.....


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