Monday, February 13, 2012

We don't do Valentines (I think)

A number of years ago the husband came home from work declaring 'We don't do Valentines do we?'

I thought for a split second before replying. 'No. We don't do Valentines. I hate it'.

'I hate it too' he went on. 'All that fake 'love' shit. Besides, I don't need Valentines Day to buy you flowers'.

'That's right' I agreed, whilst pausing to think back unsuccessfully to a time when he had bought me flowers.

'So you won't be disappointed if I don't buy you something?'

'Of course not!' I proclaimed full of superiority at those losers who played the Valentines game.

So Valentines Day came and went. No card. No present. No nothing.


The next year we had the same conversation and I braced myself for the vague disappointment and self-berating that it brought.

This time though he came home with a bunch of flowers and a card.

'But I thought we didn't do Valentines?!' I proclaimed (whilst chastising myself for being so pathetically pleased).

The next year I was ready. The conversation was had but as I smugly nodded in agreement that 'No, we don't do Valentines' I pictured the replacement wedding ring that I had bought him following the losing of his original one earlier in the year.

As I produced the box over dinner that evening he glared at me. 'But we don't do Valentines'.

Every year since there has been the same conversation and similar outcomes - either disappointment that nothing happens, guilt that he participates but I don't, or annoyance that I participate and he doesn't.

I'm so confused now that it's like a Krypton Factor challenge trying to second guess the way things will go.

This year I've decided to sit tight and do nothing - honour the pledge as it were.

But I have to ask - are we the only couple that this happens to, or is Valentines Roulette a game played by more than just us?

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